Benefits of soy
To improve cholesterol levels and better the heart, you can include soy in your diet. Preliminary reports suggest that soy may help dull pain.

In animal studies, moderate levels of phytoestrogens showed to reduce sensitivity to certain types of pain. Phytoestrogens are plant compounds that are found in high concentrations in soy and soy-based products. Including moderate amounts of soy in your diet may be helpful in reducing pain suffered by people with chronic, painful inflammation or swelling.

+ General Joke
A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in
front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale ' He rings the
bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes
into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting
there.

'You talk?' he asks.

'Yep,' the Lab replies.

After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says
'So, what's your story?'

The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk
when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the
CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in
rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be
eavesdropping.'

'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around

really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down.

I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near

suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was

awarded a batch of medals.'

'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.'

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

'Ten dollars,' the guy says.

'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'

'Because he's a liar. He never did any of that s***.'

Little Johnny was raking leaves with his Dad who was telling him about how the fairies turned the leaves brown. He looked up puzzled and said: Dad haven’t you ever heard of photosynthesis?”

Mosquito repellent
Take one vitamin B complex twice a day starting in March; this will cause your pores to exude a scent that repels mosquitoes.

+ General Joke
A Catholic Priest, an Indian Doctor, a rich Chinse Businessman and an
Aussie were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers
in front of them.

The Aussie fumed, "What's with those blokes? We must have been waiting
for fifteen minutes!"


The Indian Doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such
poor golf!"


The Chinse Businessman called out "Move it, time is money"


The Catholic Priest said, "Here comes George the greens keeper. Let's
have a word with him."


"Hello, George!", said the Catholic Priest, "What's wrong with that
group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?"


George the greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind
fire fighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire
last year, so we always let them play for free anytime."


The group fell silent for a moment.


The Catholic Priest said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special
prayer for them tonight."


The Indian Doctor said, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my
ophthalmologist colleague and see if there's anything he can do for
them."


The Chinese Businessman replied, "I think I'll donate $50,000 to the
fire-fighters in honour of these brave souls"


The Aussie said, "Why can't they play at night?"

Joe was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business. When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sick father died, he decided he needed a wife with whom to share his fortune.

One evening at an investment seminar he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her beauty took his breath away. “I may look like just an ordinary man,” he said to her, “but in just a few years, my father will pass, and I’ll inherit his large fortune.”

Impress, the woman took his business card and three months later, she became Joe’s stepmother.

Women are so much better at estate planning than men!!

The One Common Denominator
If you are searching for the common denominator in your life, you are in luck. You are it. Now that you know you are the only consistent factor in any situation, you can begin to figure out how you are contributing to your recurring challenges and problems. This is great news because, once you realize you are at least part of the problem, you can begin to change your behavior, beliefs and attitudes that are contributing to the situation. Keep in mind that you have to concern yourself only with you, not with anyone else. You are the only one you can change. So don’t focus outside yourself. Focus on the common denominator. You will be amazed at the difference this process will make in your life.

A husband, the owner of a new car, was somewhat reluctant to allow his wife to drive his prize possession…even to the Supermarket which was a few blocks from the house. After she insisted, he finally relented, cautioning her as she departed, “Remember, if you have an accident, the newspaper will print your age!”

On Traveling:
"If you reject the food, ignore the customs, fear the religion, and avoid the people, you might as well stay at home."

- James Michener

+ General Joke
Sun too hot, drinks too strong: bizarre British tourist complaints


OLIVER SMITH


September 21, 2009


Hot weather, strong alcohol and melting ice cream were among the most
bizarre complaints made by British holidaymakers this year, according to
one online travel agent.


Upon arrival in Portugal, one British family told Sunshine.co.uk of
their distress at the sunny weather and complained that they were too
“hot and sweaty” in their holiday clothes.


One man told staff of his irritation at the number of holidaymakers who
travelled with plain black suitcases, hindering his attempts to find his
own plain black suitcase on the airport conveyor belt.


After discovering that the shampoo in her luggage had leaked during her
flight, one woman bemoaned the fact that the hotel she was staying in
provided complimentary toiletries, rendering the entire incident “very
preventable”.


Another woman wrote in to complain that her plane journey was a
disappointment because the sky was far too cloudy, impeding the view for
her and her children and spoiling their game of eye-spy.


Following a trip to a local theme park, another woman wrote to the
travel agent to complain that the Log Flume ride made her feet wet and
the sun was so strong that her ice cream melted too quickly.


One couple criticised the excellent children's entertainment at their
resort – so good, in fact, that their children didn't want to spend any
time with their parents, while another couple claimed that the lunchtime
cocktails at their resort were surprisingly strong, leaving them rather
worse for wear during the afternoon.


“As much as we would like to guarantee that any problem will be dealt
accordingly to prevent it from happening again, the weather, the alcohol
being too strong, ice cream being too cold or planes flying too high are
unfortunately completely out of our control,” said a spokesman for
Sunshine.co.uk.


The Telegraph, London

A woman on the phone to her friend; I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor’s permission to join a fitness club and start exercising…. I decided to take and aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.

Protein diets
Protein may be causing you to pack on the pounds. One of the latest reports states that this might be true. A high intake of protein may lead to a high body mass index. For optimum health, limit your amount of protein intake to about 15% of your daily calories and use complex carbohydrates (fruits and vegetables) as your menu mainstay.

+ General Joke
A married couple in their early 60 ' s were celebrating their 40th Wedding
Anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.... Suddenly, a tiny
yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table. She said, "For being such an
exemplary married couple and for being loving to each other for all this
time, I will grant you each a wish."

The wife answered, "Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling
husband." The fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! - two tickets for
the Queen Mary II appeared in her hands.


The husband thought for a moment: "Well, this is all very romantic, but an
opportunity like this will never come again. I'm sorry my love, but my wish
is to have a wife 30 years younger than I."


The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish.
So the fairy waved her magic wand and poof!....the
husband became 93 years old.


The moral of this story: Men who are ungrateful should remember fairies are
female.....

+ General Joke
After his recent hole in one, Frank and his buddies were hanging out and
planning a 3-day golf outing.


Unfortunately, he had to tell them that he couldn't go this time
because his wife wouldn't allow it.


After a lot of teasing and name calling, Frank headed home totally
frustrated. The following week when Frank's buddies arrived at the golf
resort to play golf, they were shocked to see Frank sitting in the
lobby, drinking a beer, holding his putter!


"How did you talk your missus into letting you go, Frank?"


"I didn't have to," Frank replied. "Last I night I slumped down in my
chair with a beer to drown my sorrows. Then, the wife snuck up behind me
and covered my eyes and said, 'Surprise.' When I peeled her hands back,
she was standing there in beautiful see through negligee and she said,
'Carry me into the bedroom and tie me to the bed, and you can do
whatever you want'.....


SO, HERE I AM!"

+ General Joke
Swine Flu various..

I called the Swine Flu hotline - all I got was crackling

I heard that the first symptom is that you come out in rashers. Another is
that you get the trotts.


I woke up with pig tails this morning ... Should I be worried?


The doctor asked me how long I'd had the symptoms of Swine Flu. I said it
must have been about a Weeeeeeeeeeeeeek!


The only known cure for Swine Flu in humans has been found to be the liberal
application of 'oinkment'. IF YOU GET AN EMAIL ABOUT SWINE FLU DELETE IT AS
ITS ONLY SPAM.


This little piggy went to market,
This little piggy stayed at home,
This little piggy had roast beef,
This little piggy had none,
And this little piggy had influenza A virus subtype hemagglutinin protein 1
neuraminidase protein 1.


Swine flu however, is not a problem for the pigs because they're all going
to be cured anyway!


News Flash .... This just in. The world's religious leaders have issued a
joint declaration that the Swine Flu pandemic is the start of the
aporkalypse.


A new film is being planned, called "Aporkalypse Now", with Kevin Bacon in
the lead role.


Swine flu has now mixed with bird flu. Scientists say they will find a cure
when pigs fly.


I just heard on the news that, "Swine Flu could potentially be a threat to
every single person in the world". Well it's a good thing I'm married then,
isn't it?


This is not a time for panic. It is no pig deal. It is a mild hamdemic,
don't believe the spam you're getting.